Life Decisions

I really respect people who have had arranged marriages – I totally get that. No it’s not weird at all – to have an arranged marriage. I respect traditions. When they work it’s lovely, fantastic and when it doesn’t it’s sad but good experience. I had an arranged marriage – it didn’t work out – my views have changed. Half of my sisters marriages were arranged and half weren’t. I think in the news/media they always portray arrange marriages as harmful and forceful – but it’s not. Love marriages can be harmful and forced. If one partner wants it to happen, and other doesn’t. It’s all part of life isn’t it. Hope you have a good day!

00:17

Good morning! Or should I say goodnight?! It is 17 minutes past midnight, and I’m tossing and turning in bed trying get a good nights to sleep. Sadly it is not happening. In the darkness I climbed out of my bed and opened the window to let the cool air enter. My room is like an oven. Then I quietly, climbed down the stairs trying not to wake anyone into the kitchen and chopped up some apples 🍎🍏 took them back to bed. I’m feasting on the right now. Biting into each slice, listening to the crunch, juice of the apple fill my mouth. I taste sweetness and then blood. Oh no. I have bitten into the side of my cheek. Gosh I hate when that happens when flesh gets caught between your two sharp teeth at the back of your mouth and you have no control over. The sharp pain you feel and withers away as you suck the blood away. With your tongue you touch the sore area and flinch at the pain it causes you. This is only temporary, you tell yourself. You’ll forget about this tomorrow.

Moving on

You think you have moved on. Yet I still have flash backs of my ex. 

Colleagues talking imitating the northern accent so they sound like Wallace and gromit. We have a laugh and giggle in complete hysterics. I can’t keep a straight face as my male colleague puts on this high pitch voice and waves his hands about like “Windolene” – I think I have spelt that wrong. My colleague has the perfect bald head. Shiny. Just like the character Wallace. “We should have a Wallace and Gromit Day” I tell my colleagues and all start laughing. As I’m thinking about the character Wallace, my mind floats back to the past. My Ex appears. He used to cut his hair short and before we broke up he started to grow his facial hair. A little while back (couple of months ago) I saw a photo of him of how looks like now. Completely bald like a tabla, with a moustache and beard. Barely recognised him. I’m glad he’s no longer in my life. It’s weird how strange conversations bring back flash backs. The saddest part is that you can’t tell anyone. What you went through. Perhaps that is why certain relationships end as they are not meant to be. Life is a learning curve, and you have to keep bouncing back. Fall down and stand right back up again. No one will do it for you. You have to push yourself. 

Taboo Topics

I saw something online and it goes like this:

Person A: how old are you?

Person B: 33

Person A: And you don’t have kids. Wow, it’s time to get on that.

Person B: I’ve had 7miscarriages.

Person A – looking incredibly uncomfortable.

Person B: And we hope we have learnt a lesson about asking inappropriate personal questions. 

Miscarriage is an example, of a reason why someone may-not have a child. It is not always the case. But it was in the above scene. It’s shocking and annoying when people ask personal questions.

There are three answers why someone doesn’t have kids. 

1. She has chosen not to have them. The stranger is never going to be able to change her mind. 

2. She has trying desperately to have children and continues to battle infertility. 

3. She has lost her children. 

All of which are no one else’s business.

Don’t ask if you don’t want to accept the response no matter how uncomfortable you feel!

Other taboo topics are marriage and divorce. 

Another scene, at the bank:

Cashier: Are you the holder of this account?

Customer: Yes. Why is there a problem?

Cashier: Your name has changed. Aren’t you married?

Customer: No, I’m divorced. Can I have my money now?

Cashier – looking uncomfortable and awkward.

Cashier: well you look much happier now. 

Don’t ask questions, about people’s status, it’s none of your business. 

Mind your own business

What has my status got to do with anybody?! 

Nothing. So mind your own business. 

Strangers. Colleagues. So called friends and family sometimes. 

Don’t use my status as a reason or excuse that is unrelated.

It’s pathetic.

Special Guy.

Late night fiction writing by Realtalewryter.. 02:23am 

There once lived a boy who was tall, fair and dark haired. He had  a passion for music, and playing different instruments. Including exotic pets such as a tarantula. He had big hands. He was good at decorating, fixing up his cars and motor cycle. 

He met a girl at work one day and fell for her straight away. 

The girl was petite, with short red ends and dark hair with an olive complexion. 

The girl however was friendly yet withdrawn. Curious of him. As he was constantly always helping her out and being extremely kind. “Was he for real?” She thought to herself. 

One day she needed help with a furniture item. One of the colleagues told her to ask him. Shyly, she did.

“What’s in it for me?” He asked.

“I’ll cook you dinner?” A peace offering she thought. Everyone likes food, right?!

Soon they became friends. He constantly asked her to meet up. She didn’t think much of it. She enjoyed his company and he enjoyed hers. 

Then the company began to make redundancies. Sadly she was one which lost her job. It was a sad day for him. Not seeing her at work. They continued to keep in touch. 

Watch dvds together, jam on guitars, recommend music to each other. He talked to her about his health, he was suffering from depression. He talked about his abusive childhood, his mother. Then his happier times with his father. She was very sad to hear about his past. He was more fragile than he was putting on. 

Then one late evening, he texted her and told her he tried to commit suicide. It made her anxious and immediately she contacted him worried about his well being. 

He wouldn’t reply to her calls. She asked him for his fathers or best friends contact number – in case it happened he felt like that again. He replied he would give it to her. Then another day he replied with anguish and accused her of being pushy.

She was sad. So she rang the Samaritans for advice. It was good advice and they told her she did the right thing. Trying to get his family details so she can contact them if anything happened to him.

Then he came out straight that he was fond of her and he wanted more. 

Her reply was she liked his friendship and company. She didn’t want to be ‘friends with benefits’ – she’s not that sort of girl. If he wants something else, they should not be in contact. 

At first he was ok about it and stopped talking to her. He felt rejected. She was sad she had lost a friend. But it’s his loss, if he didn’t think their friendship was worth having. 

Then he contacted her again, to have the last word. He blocked her off all social networks. 

She wasn’t bothered. His loss. She kept herself busy with travelling and work. 

One night she was out with friends and received a late text from him.. One of the short “hey..” messages that you know means TROUBLE. A lonely male wanting female company.. 😡 She deleted it straight away.. Then her again some months later he messaged her, during the day, telling her he’s got a new job. She replied knowing that it was a very bad idea, congratulating him. He replied saying he’s happy and glad that she replied to his message. She responded “Really?” And asked when it was his last day. 

She wished his good luck for his new job. 

Then he replied telling her he’s really busy and has met a new person. 

How bizarre! She thought. He contacted her to tell her -he’s now snatched up. 

Special Person for a Special Guy.

The End.

Reality 

You don’t have to watch “Eastenders” my life is pretty dramatic enough. Come and watch an episode of me.. 

Really I mean it. Spend a day being me in my fantastic dysfunctional large family. Characters which you’ll love and hate. Never a day is the same. 

Sadly there are somethings that will keep repeating in your life until you learn it. We learn through pain. 

What is Love Island?

A programme about polyamory? Men and women between ages of 20years to 35years meet and find their true love? A relationship big brother reality show! I don’t normally watch “trash” reality tv, so please don’t judge. It’s quite entertaining and funny. 😂🙈

I hope not all men just go for looks and drop their women for another. And it’s same for women, “pied off” their men for another. The language is so hilarious. It’s like I’m learning a new form of English language. Slang language! 

Relationships are complicated. You will definitely get hurt in process when trying to find your suitor. There are players out there and some genuine, kind but rare people. 

As long as you stay true to yourself, and keep to your personal principles, no one can make you do what you want.